The Tension of the Temporary

from journal 4/20/2011  a few weeks at the new house. Every day I feel it. The tension of the temporary. Being here only for a mist and making our lives count.  There’s no one that’s immune, no one that doesn’t want their life to have meaning.   We long for the beautiful, but settle for the false representations our culture presents us, only leaving us longing… This morning alone, I drive past some run down townhomes near my home, and see many people waiting for the bus.  I see a quietness, stillness as most of them wait alone, not speaking  and then I notice the property sign, “Hope” Properties.  Every day I try to catch someone’s eye and smile, and wonder when I’ll just walk over and meet them. I continue driving toward my home and see a fence falling apart, and notice the truck across the street is full of wood meant for the house with a perfectly intact fence already.   I watch a documentary trailer on Brazil that deeply moves me.  I close my eyes and want to be there in the village, among the people, surrounded by trash, being light to disheartened, broken people, and making their world better…  As I close the screen, I’m greeted with the iTunes latest unsettling ad for a popular musician and CD cover.  I’m struck by the contrast of my worlds today.  The sadness of people in need in a world that offers much. Plenty and not enough.  The magnitude of the beauty of our human spirit met with spiritual atrophy.  I sit in my pretty home with my pretty things...

Happy New Year!

This year we went to Hondo to a place Jim’s family has and ‘camped’ in RVs, spending time with his parents and my brother and niece.  We sat around campfires each morning and each night, went on numerous rides in the Kawasaki Mule, wrapped the treehouse with lights that Jim built, rode the zip line and had a great time.  The picture above was taken after Libby created ‘art’ with fire and an old styrofoam cup.  As I walked up to her, my intent was to tell her not to do what she was about to do… sticking her sparkler into the cup.  But as I walked  over, I loved how the only light on her, her face and the cup was from the sparkler, and stopped to grab a shot first. Not my finest parenting moment, but I did kindly ask her to stop once I snapped a shot.   She and her sister continued making ‘sculptures’ all weekend with sticks in the campfire, melting plastic forks, cups, and styrofoam into shapes. On actual NY Eve, my brother showed up with his daughter, and I was so excited they joined.  My brother below with Jim in the Mule, gearing up for zip lines. As we sent each kid down the zip line, we laughed for over an hour.  Kelli fell out of the chair at least twice at the end of the ride, while Beck kept getting caught up in the chair trying to get out and Libby kept trying to go with her feet up and upside down.  I’m amazed at how different and unique each child...

Happy New Year!

This year we went to Hondo to a place Jim’s family has and ‘camped’ in RVs, spending time with his parents and my brother and niece.  We sat around campfires each morning and each night, went on numerous rides in the Kawasaki Mule, wrapped the treehouse with lights that Jim built, rode the zip line and had a great time.  The picture above was taken after Libby created ‘art’ with fire and an old styrofoam cup.  As I walked up to her, my intent was to tell her not to do what she was about to do… sticking her sparkler into the cup.  But as I walked  over, I loved how the only light on her, her face and the cup was from the sparkler, and stopped to grab a shot first. Not my finest parenting moment, but I did kindly ask her to stop once I snapped a shot.   She and her sister continued making ‘sculptures’ all weekend with sticks in the campfire, melting plastic forks, cups, and styrofoam into shapes. On actual NY Eve, my brother showed up with his daughter, and I was so excited they joined.  My brother below with Jim in the Mule, gearing up for zip lines. As we sent each kid down the zip line, we laughed for over an hour.  Kelli fell out of the chair at least twice at the end of the ride, while Beck kept getting caught up in the chair trying to get out and Libby kept trying to go with her feet up and upside down.  I’m amazed at how different and unique each child...

Kids. Pandora. Art & Christmas…

a few days ago, we decided to make posters of Christmas words and decorate them.  The kids did this while Christmas music played, and enjoyed the time.  Today, I had to test a few things for a shoot I have in the morning, so I just asked the kids to step in… actually, I had to make them do it… but anyway, they did, and as chaotic as it was with these crazy kids, and with a little help from our friend, Jordan, there were a few fun shots.  Merry Christmas to everyone, and I hope each of you are blessed with Joy, and Love, and Jesus this season.   Can’t you see the hope in their...

Kids. Pandora. Art & Christmas…

a few days ago, we decided to make posters of Christmas words and decorate them.  The kids did this while Christmas music played, and enjoyed the time.  Today, I had to test a few things for a shoot I have in the morning, so I just asked the kids to step in… actually, I had to make them do it… but anyway, they did, and as chaotic as it was with these crazy kids, and with a little help from our friend, Jordan, there were a few fun shots.  Merry Christmas to everyone, and I hope each of you are blessed with Joy, and Love, and Jesus this season.   Can’t you see the hope in their...

Sisters…

If you have a sister, you can remember how you felt at one point about them when you were younger, and how you may have looked up to them, wished they would leave you alone, or how your life seemed to be measured somehow by who they were or were not.  I watch my girls and see a lot of the same things, and how they seek some definition of who they are measured by the other one.  It’s a constant thing I remind them of, their uniqueness and the intentionality of God for it.  Some days they need their own space, and some days they don’t click at all, but most days, there’s an obvious bond that will never be broken.  I watched this in multitudes after our move and as we all bonded together more and more just to feel normal.  As with life, everyone had days that were hard.  What I saw is each time, everyone dropped their differences immediately, and offered hope to the other.   Watching Libby be there to comfort her little sister as she grieved her friends, old neighborhood and home will be a life memory I’ll never forget.   The big sister who usually isn’t interested in hugs from Ella, her little sister, is suddenly wrapped around her speaking words of comfort and encouragement.  As days come that make them sad or miss what they once knew, I get to see visions of Libby holding her little sister while she cries, our family holding hands and praying, and the bond gets stronger.  Laughter and joy dominate us now, and it seems...